“Sinners are perishing for lack of knowledge…Jesus gave both His hands to the nails. How can I keep back one of mine from His blessed work? Night and day He toiled and prayed for me. How can I give a single hour to the pampering of my body with luxurious ease? Up, lazy heart; stretch out your hand to work, or lift it up to pray. Heaven and hell are serious; so must I be, and this evening I should sow good seed for the Lord my God.” – Charles Spurgeon

If I’m praying that I ‘want’ to serve others more, or find ways to involve my family in servant ministry together more, that wouldn’t be truthful. In my flesh, I don’t really want to do anything more than what my flesh has to do. But my soul isn’t satisfied with laziness. And my spirit spurs me on to something…more.

Not out of obligation to be a better Christian, or guilt that I’m not raising my children to serve with a spirit of others-centeredness. I simply viscerally know this life is short and it’s arrogant of me to waste it staring at a screen or in constant pursuit of some sort of entertainment, like a concert or sports event.

So, my prayer is simple. And though it feels like it starts ten yards in front of the actual starting line, it’s realistically where I am. Thank you, Lord, I’m at least positioned somewhere on the track. My prayer is not that I desire to sow good seed for you, God. It’s that you will give me the desire to sow good seed for you. That I will want to want to do your work; to love you more than life–and in that, love others more than I love my comfort. That I will see life through a wider lens and hurt for the lost, surrender my personal ‘wants’ for the care of those who need to know Truth, and teach my children to do the same.

To have the eyes to see and ears to hear–and maybe even the creativity–to know how you can use me to do all of this. Please, Father, give me the desire to desire this so I can be used as you’ve purposed me.